Posted on by Kyle Roques

A Breakthrough in Therapy

I’d like to share a recent breakthrough I’ve had in therapy. You’ll need just a quick background of my symptoms from childhood trauma to understand the break through. Basically I exhibit an irrational rage to any emotionally charged situation. So the closer people are to me and the more emotionally charged the situation, the more I rage. Anger is largely a learned behavior. While my dad wasn’t ever abusive towards us kids, he did have anger issues, he would react with anger to high stress situations. I learned how to react with to the world with anger by watching my father. My abusive mother is what ingrained triggers in me that will provoke an angry response to things that seem to be not at all connected to my trauma.

So these triggers induce a rage in me. What I’ve learned is that I’m not really angry. With humans, anger and rage are almost always a cover for much deeper feelings. In situations that relate to my triggers, I found that what is at the core of my anger is fear. When I get afraid my unconscious reaction is to get angry. The anger and rage completely cover any fear I feel. I know this logically, but I cannot separate the fear and anger internally. I don’t feel afraid at all, just mad, I only know this intellectually because it’s the only thing that explains my over the top reactions I have to everyday minor situations.

Part of my breakthrough is this: In a therapy session, when I was talking about my current feelings, I started to feel the rage build in me. I was guided by my therapist to “walk through” my anger so to speak, to interact with it, ask it questions, investigate it. In doing that, she actually enabled me to separate my anger from my fear. I was able to physically feel my fear separate from my anger in my body. Something that has never happened to me yet, even after a few years of pretty intense therapy.

So in doing this it enabled me to investigate my fear. Again, something I’ve never been able to do. I was able to ask myself what I’m still afraid of after all these years. My mother was physically (and emotionally) abusive when I was a child, back then I was obviously afraid of her in a physically sense. She’s 4 foot 10 inches, so I haven’t been physically scared of her for a long time. What I found is that the same physical fear I used to have, morphed into a fear I have that is wrapped up in guilt. I’m afraid I’m making the wrong decision with my mother. For those that don’t know, about a year ago I cut my mother off completely, like absolutely 0 contact with her at all. Even though my 3 other siblings are still very much involved in her life.

I’m afraid I’m making the wrong choice here. I now have to learn to separate the guilt from the fear. Because the guilt I feel about cutting off my mother is inducing the same fear I felt as a child, which is causing my rage in everyday situations.

That’s the breakthrough I had. Firstly, I was able to actually separate my anger from the fear, to be able to investigate my fear. Then I found that my guilt is wrapped up in my fear, something that is constantly looming over me. I obviously still have a lot more work to do, but now I have a direction to go, I can try to untangle my guilt from my fear.

This is what therapy is for. This is the tough spiritual work one has to go through for real change. You can understand how the human mind works on an intellectual level all you want, but you have to actually put these things to practice in your own mind. You have to have a rich inner life to look into the depths of your soul, to investigate the things that you’re not in control of. This is wisdom. This is gnosis.

Posted on by Kyle Roques

No Redemption in Equality

Many people have a time or period in their life where they feel their life lacks purpose, meaning, direction, and take on a nihilistic world view. Some people live like that and never escape. When I started my career after school is when this period came for me – which is a very common time for most people.

I felt lost so to speak and became very nihilistic without any purpose, meaning, and direction. In life there is this philisophic principle or idea about “quality”. This idea of “quality” basically says that there are qualitative distinctions between things and that as humans, we have an instinct to make qualitative distinctions. A qualitative distinction is just saying that “this” is better than “that” or vice-versa. So a qualitative distinction is a judgment.

There is this modern idea that we are to accept ourselves and that we are OK just as we are. Many people (especially the younger generations) are conflating what this means and take it literally. They accept themselves and don’t work towards bettering who they are. Jordan Peterson thinks this is an insane idea and couldn’t be more nihilistic. This is because you are NOT ok, and the reason you’re not ok is because you could be WAY more than what you are. So do you want to be ok as you are? Or do you want to strive towards what’s better?

I’ve come a very long way from my nihilism. I have filled my life with copious amounts of purpose and meaning, and have gained plenty of direction in doing so. The turning point for me was because I knew I wasn’t happy with my current mode of Being. I didn’t consider the manner in which I conducted myself to be sufficient. To do this you have to understand the notion that you CAN make “qualitative distinctions” and that there really is a difference between “good” things and “bad” things, or “great” things and “evil” things etc.. This gives you direction and the possibility of moving upward. You have to maintain the idea that we as humans are insufficient as we are and need the movement upward. So you have to conceptualize something like the “highest good” and then strive towards that.

This is what Christ is in the Bible (the highest good) and why the biblical story gives people so much direction and meaning – something to strive towards. There is an idea in Revelations that the “redeemer” and “judge” are the same thing. Christ comes back with a flaming sword in his mouth to judge the people of earth. Most people were damned and some were saved.

There is no difference between conceptualizing the good and being judged. Because to conceptualize the good and move towards it, means that you have to separate from yourselves all the things that aren’t good and leave them behind. This is why “redeemer” and the “judge” are the same thing.

That’s the problem in the modern world with how we are rejecting qualitative distinctions, to not offend anyone/hurt anyone’s feelings, because we are just fine as we are and don’t want to say one thing is better than the other. Sure, it’s not any fun to be casted off with the damned, but if people are insufficient in their present condition (which seems to be the case, try finding someone who is not) and you deny the possibility of qualitative distinctions, because you want to promote a radical egalitarianism, then you remove the possibility of redemption – because there is no movement towards the good. Sacrificing the “good” for the “equal” is catastrophic, because if we were all equal, we’d all be equally un redeemed and miserable.

So to live a life full of meaning, direction, and purpose, you to understand that you are insufficient as you are. You have to conceptualize the highest good and strive for it – the continuation of our species depends on it.

Posted on by Kyle Roques

Forget – Me – Not

I want to share, what I feel, is a cool piece of Freemasonic history.

The “forget-me-not” flower (Myosotic arvensis – from the Greek, meaning “Mouse’s Ear,” after the shape of its five petals) has a pretty rich history in ancient folklore. The Germans have a few different mythological stories surrounding the origin of flower and how it got its name.

The flower – in general – symbolizes true love, enduring memory, steadfastness, and faithfulness. In 1926, after the first world war in Germany – during their economic crisis – at the German Grand Lodge annual communication, they gave its members a forget-me-not pin, to remind the brethren of their charitable obligations.

During WW2 when Hitler took power, Freemasonry was forbidden and disbanded. The Nazis even had exhibitions showing all the Masonic regalia they had seized. An estimated 80k – 200k Freemasons were executed throughout the Nazi empire.

Masonic lore tells us that during this time of Nazi control, the Grand Lodge of Germany adopted the forget-me-not, not as an emblem of charity, but as a substitute for the square and compass. It was used as a sign of recognition for the brethren, reducing their risk of exposure to the Nazis.

“During the ensuing decade of Nazi power a little blue Forget Me Not flower worn in a Brother’s lapel served as one method whereby brethren could identify each other in public and in cities and concentration camps throughout Europe. The Forget Me Not distinguished the lapels of countless brethren who staunchly refused to allow the symbolic Light of Masonry to be completely extinguished, even under penalty of death.

It was a symbol that masonry, like the flower itself, was not dead, but had merely gone dormant to weather the decade long winter. It was a symbol to its members not to forget each other, or their masonic vows, until spring had come again and the blue of masonry could flourish once more.”

“Legends like these are not told to teach us historical fact; they are meant to teach us enduring truth, or even truths, plural. And the truths of the forget-me-not are these; we must never forget our duty to the poor and distressed. We must never forget to persevere through troubled times, as light and life will always spring anew. We must never forget those who have come before us; the sacrifices they made, and the love that they shared with us. We must never forget our duty to honor their memory, and continue their legacy of brotherly love, relief, and truth. Amor fraternus, levatio, veritas. Forget. Me. Not.”

Posted on by Kyle Roques

The Many Dimensions of a Freemasonic Lodge Meet

In the course of one lodge meeting, Freemasonry is a spiritual organization when the chaplain leads the brethren in prayer and asks for the blessing of Diety. It is a guild when the Master of the lodge teaches the new Mason the symbolic uses of stonemason’s tools. It becomes a school of instruction when the new brother learns about the importance of the 7 liberal arts and sciences. At other moments, it is an amateur theater company when the ritual is performed. The lodge becomes a men’s social club when meeting for dinner and fellowship. It becomes a charitable group when relief is provided to distressed brothers, their families or the local community perlocal community. It is also a business association when members with similar interests share ideas. The lodge resembles a family when fathers and sons, strangers and friends bond as ‘brothers’, and it is a community league when volunteers are needed for a project.

Mark Tabbert
Posted on by Kyle Roques

So, What is Masonic Ritual?

Traditionally, the primary purpose of the ritual is to educate the candidate. The rituals are closer to a play/drama/performance than anything else.

The ceremonial lore revolves around the period during which the First Temple at Jerusalem was built by King Solomon. King Solomon. The stories build from a peaceful and regal beginning which explains the inspiration for and construction of the Temple, leading up to a cataclysmic event which has come to symbolize the central morality of Speculative Freemasonry.

Throughout the series of short plays, you’ll come across dozens of metaphors, imparting the moral criteria which a Freemason is expected to aspire to. The ritual is composed of exquisitely crafted language, and for most masons the messages go in and stay in, enabling them to live a more positive and fulfilled live.

Rick Smith

Many avoid Freemasonry because they feel it would be “too religious” for them (myself included, until I learned more about the fraternity). If you have no issues with attending a church wedding or funeral, or being a Godfather for someone’s new baby, you should not meet any greater religious demands in craft masonry. Masons do not worship in craft lodges; that is the role of the Church.

The obvious overlap between Religion and Freemasonry is morality, which both teach as a primary function. The key difference in their approach is that fundamental religion tends towards ‘God-fearing morality’ whilst craft masonry speaks more to the Moral Compass, and the idea that your behavior in life should be geared towards preserving the stability of society and the happiness of everyone around you. For the purpose of learning and executing Masonic craft ritual, religion has no direct relevance whatsoever.

They say that “Politics is showbiz for ugly people!” For the rest of us, there’s Masonry. Ritual’s primary purpose is to implant the moral metaphors of Masonic teaching. That’s unequivocal.

Rick Smith

Being initiated into the 1st degree of Freemasonry, passed to the 2nd degree, and raised to the 3rd degree of Master Mason, does not at all make you instantly enlightened. You’re more or less just obligated into keeping the “secrets” of Masonry at that point. Being the candidate, going through the three degrees (plays), you’re really not participating, you’re just being instructed and walked through. So, actually learning the ritual, being engaged and involved, actually playing a role in the ritual (drama/play), is what enables you to really learn the metaphors/teachings. It is meant to be something that you will be taking in and learning for a lifetime – and that’s the point. While also finding fulfillment in having an active role in passing down these teachings, bettering yourself, your brothers, and community.

So, in short: As I’ve stated before, there really are no secrets in Freemasonry, all the “secret” knowledge is passed down through the ritual. This “secret knowledge” being universal teachings that we all know and live by as humans. The only real secret being how this knowledge is delivered — via the ritual.

The main reason for the secrecy is because it’s like spoiling a movie. If I tell you what the ritual is, everything that’s in it and how it’s delivered, then when you experience it yourself it won’t have the same impact and effect as it would if you didn’t know anything about it. Knowing everything beforehand would totally ruin the experience and the effect it is supposed to have on your psyche.

Posted on by Kyle Roques

The Divine Power

Nearly all the sacred books of the world can be traced in anatomical analogy. This is most evident in their creation myths.

Proceeding from this assumption of the first theologians that man is actually fashioned in the image of God, the initiated minds of past ages erected the stupendous structure of theology on the foundation of the human body. The religious world of today is almost totally ignorant of the fact that the science of biology is the fountainhead of its doctrines and tenants. Many of the codes and laws believed by modern divines to have been direct revelations from Divinity are in reality the fruitage of ages of patient delving into the intricacies of the human constitution and the infinite wonder is revealed by such a study.

Christianity itself may be cited as an example.

The entire New Testament is in fact an ingenuously concealed exposition of the secret processes of human regeneration. The characters so long considered as historical men and women are really the personification of certain processes which take place in the human body when man begins the task of consciously liberating himself from the bondage of ignorance and death.

Manly P. Hall
Posted on by Kyle Roques

Freemasonry’s Priceless Heritage

The sanctum sanctorum of Freemasonry is ornamented with the gnostic jewels of a thousand ages; its rituals ring with the divinely inspired words of seers and sages. A hundred religions have brought their gifts of wisdom to its altar; arts and sciences unnumbered have contributed to its symbolism. Freemasonry is a world-wide university, teaching the liberal arts and sciences of of the soul to all who will hearken to its words. It’s chairs are seats of learning and its pillars uphold an arch of universal education.

The philosophic power of Freemasonry lies in its symbols – it’s priceless heritage from the Mystery schools of antiquity. In a letter to Robert Freke Gould, Albert Pike writes:

“In it’s symbolism, which and it’s spirit of brotherhood are its essence, Freemasonry is more ancient than any of the world’s living religions. …”

Though Zoroaster, Hermes, Pythagoras, Plato. and Aristotle are now but dim memories in a world once rocked by the transcendency of their intellectual genius, still in the mystic temple of Freemasonry these god-men live again in their words and symbols; and the candidate, passing through the initiations, feels himself face-to-face with these illumined heirphants of days long past.

Manly P. Hall
Posted on by Kyle Roques

Temple Initiation

To truly enter the Temple a change in mind set must occur, this is sometimes referred to as “the process of initiation into the Mysteries” – the development of the intelligence of the heart – the Initiate must learn to focus on the inside rather than the outside and look beyond the visible to the invisible, to what lies beneath and the world within.


Its precisely the things we don’t see – we can’t see – that were the secrets of the Mystery schools. A sometimes difficult concept to grasp, it can require an adjustment in thinking and perception, as it focuses not on the physical, material world, but on its underlying causes. The great Mysteries concerned the invisible laws, forces, archetypes, and secret connections that are the building blocks – the invisible templates of our reality – and perhaps the roadmap to operating in higher realms as well.

Magical Egypt Episode 1
Posted on by Kyle Roques

Occultism

The Occult, what is it? The only time I ever hear the term is in conspiracy videos when someone is referencing Satan/demon worship, human sacrifice, demonic rituals, and lately pedophilia. Or in the mainstream to talk about vampires or, again, satan worship. The term Occult is one of the most misunderstood and misrepresented words that people with zero knowledge of the Occult like to throw around to any ritualistic practice they deem evil. The Christian church has worked for millennia to distance themselves from the term, by using it to label anything spiritual they deem heretic and claiming none of their practices are of the occult, or have any occult origins. Their smear campaign has been so effective it is embedded into all of western thought in both religous and atheistic cirlcles.

The term is a bit vague so it can mean alot of different things, sort of like the term religion. So in simplist terms the occult as a noun is defined as: supernatural, mystical, or magical beliefs, practices, or phenomena and/or matters regarded as involving the action or influence of supernatural or supernormal powers or some secret knowledge of them. It is also used as an adjective, simply meaning: not revealed/secret, not easily apprehended/understood, not manifest or detectable by clinical methods alone, and used in astronomy/astrology to mean: hidden from view/concealed.

In none of that is occult defined as Satan worship, pedophilia, or blood rituals. If you were to define Christianity as Occult is being defined now, then Christianity would mean Jim Jones and kool-aid. Now to briefly address the word “magic”. Again, another totally loaded word that I could make another lengthy post out of, so I’ll define it as simply as possible (doing the word injustice) to not detract from this post. Magic for me is defined as: the means of infulencing/manipulating the subjective and objective world through the act of intention and concentrated will power.

So with these definitions in mind you can see how the Eucharist ritual (Christianity’s communion) is an Occult magic ritual. Many aspects of Christian belief, prayer and ritual/ceremony are of occult narure, utilizing ritual magic. So indeed many of your own beliefs are occult beliefs – whether you practice any religion or not – and are of occult nature/origin.
Native American (or any indigenous people) Shamans, Christian priests, Buddhist, Hindu, and the like prcatice occult arts.

Practically all of the philosophy I profess and all of the books I read are of the “occult”. Any spiritual leader prcatices occult arts. Tarot is occult, meditation and prayer can be ritualistic magic, anything from personal/private, all the way through to Freemason, and on up to Christian rituals are occult rituals.

So as you can see the “Occult” isn’t what you think it is and it is likely you have occult beliefs and practices. The people who throw the term around to call something foreign to them evil have, I’m sure, never truly investigated the occult, or the word wouldn’t be so stigmatized. Please use this to see the term occult as it truly is, just a loaded word that describes a “hidden” magical practice/belief that isn’t at all evil or sinister.